Wednesday, June 27, 2012

Finally a Good Day!

After a few days of no improvement in my throat with benadryl and advil, I decided to try to drink some of my liquid Nystatin (anti-fungal). My tongue was getting completely white again so I figured Candida might be to blame. Luckily, a few doses gave me back my ability to swallow without pain and I was able to eat and drink again!

I was allowed to restart Rifampin and the rest of the week I felt the same as always. I was very tired with a lot of eye twitching coming back and hand and leg numbness returning. I don't think I've had a herx yet on it. I have felt this way for months whether I'm on or off meds.

I am not eating well and haven't been for a long time. I know that the amount of calories that I'm eating combined with the level of physical activity that I have to maintain at work is eventually going to catch up to me in a negative way. So now when I do eat, I make sure it is a very high calorie food like whey protein shakes in coconut milk, coconut milk ice cream (no sugar) and nuts.

When I went to my IV this week, I was not feeling well. I was extremely dizzy and getting very frustrated again because the last several times, my IV has not really helped me like it used to. The last time I had one, I tried to go for a walk and my heart started beating so fast and I became so instantly ill feeling that I felt like I needed to lie down IMMEDIATELY. I came home, took a cold shower and then started to throw up 3-4 times before I fell asleep in an unusually short amount of time (5 minutes or less). When I woke up I felt better for a few days, but my energy was not good enough for any further walks and definitely no running.

This week I was not in the best mood at my IV appointment. I was so tired that I just didn't feel like talking much. I feel bad about this now. I could have been friendlier. I started to get really dizzy during the IV. Likely from not eating much over the past several days. In the back of my mind I was thinking, there is no way that this IV can work well enough for me to go running this week. I'm way too weak and sick.

Well by some miracle, the IV actually worked better than it ever has! By the time I got home, I had a normal appetite and ate quite a bit. Then I decided to go for a walk which quickly turned into a 5 mile jog since I was feeling so good. I jogged up the steep hill with no heart problems. That is extremely rare for me lately. I had enough energy to jog up the hill that comes right before I get back to my house as well. I had absolutely no joint or muscle pain, dizziness or fatigue for the 6 hours that I was awake. I was even able to play one of my musical instruments; something I have not wanted to do for many months since I have lost the ability to move my hands as accurately as is needed to play with any level of skill. Then I had a good amount of sleep. Not anxiety ridden and not total exhaustion either.

I woke up at 5:00 a.m. the next day like always and most of my symptoms were coming back. I was pretty weak again already. However, this time I wasn't upset. I am SO happy that I got a few hours to go running and feel normal. I was really worried that I was going to lose that too. It's the first time I've gone that far without pain or symptoms popping up. With the way I've been feeling the last few months, I would have been happy with as little as 10 minutes of relief.

I will be happy to report the good day to my LLMD and the doctor that does my IV next week. I always feel like I have nothing but negative things to say. That's one reason I'm sometimes quiet at appointments. I don't want to be a chronic complainer and negative all the time, but there have been a lot of weeks lately that I really can't find anything positive symptom-wise.